Practise Becoming

Making your Journey Meaningful

The writer Kurt Vonnegut said “You’re always going to be in the process of becoming who you want to be, so you may as well learn to enjoy it – so Practise Becoming”

This is very powerful advise. As I retired on 30th June 2024  from my role at Indian Hotels after a 37-year career, it is tempting to think and say – You have seen and done it all. Over the last few months, I have realised that there is so much more that I don’t know, there is so much more that I can do. Socrates famously said “An unexamined life is not worth living” – in essence he was urging all of us to truly try and get a sense of what we know and thereby realise there is much we don’t know. (Sadly, by saying this to the powerful people at Athens was the reason why he had to die by drinking Hemlock – because he put too many people off by saying that they don’t know stuff).

The following piece is from an article I had published on Linkedin in 2017, but I keep going back to it – at one level it is about the books I have read, but more importantly, around what they teach us and the imperatives that we all have to Practise Becoming. So here you go.

Success as an end point is usually elusive – so Practise Becoming is a way which makes the journey meaningful and focusses on improvement all the time. Practise Becoming strikes a chord immediately. I wish I had this advice and was more conscious when I started my career in 1987. So, I thought in this article, I will focus on some great learnings from the books that I read over the years, which has helped me in my career and my life so far.

For someone who is beginning their career, I would only point to the advice that Steve Jobs gave, that you can only connect the dots of your life backwards, never forward. So, the important thing is to focus on the present and enjoy the journey.

In the formative years, I have cherished Stephen Covey’s Seven Habits. His focus on ‘Independence’ (being proactive, begin with the end in mind and putting first things first), ‘Interdependence’ (Think win-win, seek first to understand and then be understood and synergise) and finally ‘Continuous Improvement’ (sharpen the saw) have been great pillars. Along with this, Peter Drucker’s The Practise of Management/Effective Executive has been a great reading and continues to be.

Very quickly, you learn that all your academic excellence and IQ matters only up to a point. Daniel Goleman’s Emotional Intelligence is a must read. He forces us to be ‘Self Aware, Socially Aware and Manage Relationships’ successfully.

Tom Peters’ In Search of Excellence had an impact on me through two big learnings – his focus on Bias for Action and Sticking to the Knitting struck a chord. Karma Yoga in our own scriptures tells us the importance of Action. I related Tom Peters’ ‘Sticking to the Knitting’ with CK Prahlad’s Core Competence, the one difference being that CK Prahlad said that core competence can be built. If you stick to the knitting, you may miss out on building new competencies.

CK Prahlad’s Strategic Intent was a real eye opener, which essentially said that all companies must begin with a ‘Strategic Intent’. Compaq in its first year of operations out of a garage, defined itself as a global company in its formative years. In the last few years, the rise of the internet giants – Google, Facebook, Uber, have really demonstrated the significance of ‘Strategic Intent’. It has been a revelation about how the internet and new business models can overturn traditional thinking and ways of doing things.

One book I really admire is Jo Owen’s Mindset of Success. This is an eight step primer – which urges us to ‘Dare to Dream ’, have ‘Courage to Act’, have ‘Resilience to Stay the Course’, ‘Be Positive and Believe in the Better’, teaches us ‘Accountability – Controlling our Destiny’, encourages a ‘Collaborative Mindset – Succeeding through Others’, encourages us to ‘Have a Growth Mindset’, while cautioning against some of the ‘Inner Demons’. A very simple and great read.

Over the years as you grow, you realise how important Leadership is. I would strongly recommend reading Warren Bennis’ On Becoming a Leader.  We need to decide what is important, Warren said and therefore leadership is becoming more and more yourself. And this is important advice – the typical advice is to be a Jack Welch or a Bill Gates. But becoming yourself, is very different. Rob Goffee and Gareth Jones echo the same views in their brilliant book with an “in the face” title Why Should Anyone be Led by You. In this book, they say, you don’t have to be anyone else, just ‘Be Authentic’, but do so with skill.

As we grow through career and life, we all experience our ups and downs. What stays with us and keeps our sanity is ‘Authenticity’. I have been deeply influenced by Bill George’s True North. Bill George helps us to discover our authentic self – he says our life stories define our leadership and in a very anecdotal way, forces us to think through our ‘Values, Principles and Ethical Boundaries.’ He encourages us to build towards an ‘Integrated Life.’ In my view, this is a must read to navigate our personal and professional lives with ease.

Our scriptures are great teachers too! The Sundarakanda from the Valmiki Ramayana is a powerful teacher. The Kanda tells us the story of Hanuman leaping off the cliff to cross the ocean in search of Sita in Lanka. The Kanda beings with a strong message of Action when Hanuman leaps off the cliff. It reminds us of having the end in mind, when he resolutely rejects distractions along the way. It has its moments of despair when Hanuman struggles to find Sita and resorts to Prayer and Positivity. The Kanda tells us that with patience and effort, your luck turns and you can look forward to great endings. Whenever, I have felt a bit depressed, I have turned to the Sundarakanda for an instant lift.

Beyond the career, life plays out – ageing parents, growing children, flourishing friendships among other things. Bill George’s integrated life requires us to find a balance in all of this. Defining what matters is crucial. Suddenly you realise that life is not just about yourself. It is about blending into an ecosystem and doing what is required to play our roles effectively and meaningfully as a parent, child, colleague, friend etc. Turning to scriptures and engaging in self-reflection is a great way. The Speaking Tree can be a great way to catch up on the learnings from different religions and gurus.

Beyond these books, I have found The Economist a handy weekly read. Gives you a worldview in a short magazine. I enjoy reading Lunch with FT – which showcases little vignettes from great personalities.

We need to put into practise what we read. Developing habits is critical – Charles Duhigg’s Power of Habit  and James Clear’s Atomic Habits - are a powerful reminder of why we do what we do and telling us how to change what we do. Someone said ‘Reading is for Transformation and not for Information.’

Practise Becoming … I come back to it – great advise that keeps you grounded. I used to work for Diageo and as Johnnie Walker says “Keep Walking” which epitomises Personal Progress.

Here is a toast to you as you reflect on your journey.

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