Vidal: The Art of Letting Go

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After a career break of nearly ten years, my friend Radha decided to return to work. I was genuinely happy for her. She had given up her career soon after her marriage and had long resented that decision. Once her son moved to higher classes, she felt it was time to reclaim her professional life and rejoin her former employer.

A couple of weeks later, I checked in on her. She mentioned there was just one problem. Her husband, Muthukumar, returned home by 6 p.m., while she could get back only by 7:30 p.m. His dinner was left in limbo, and it troubled her deeply.

I suggested hiring a maid who could come in the evening and cook dinner for them. That was how Lakshmiyamma entered their lives—a woman in her sixties, sincere, punctual, and an excellent cook.

When I didn’t hear from Radha for some time, I called her. Her weary “hello” said it all.

“How are things at work and home? Lakshmiyamma must be a big help, isn’t she?” I asked.

“I fired her,” Radha said bluntly.

“Why?” I was surprised.

“She takes leave often. She cooks too much food. Who is there at home to eat so much?” she fumed.

But with a little probing, it became clear these weren’t the real reasons. Lakshmiyamma was, in fact, an excellent cook, and Muthukumar openly appreciated her culinary skills. Radha could not bear this. She decided to discontinue Lakshmiyamma’s services.

“All these years, Muthu has never uttered a single word praising my cooking. Now he appreciates Lakshmiyamma every day,” she said, fretting and burning inside.

Instead, Radha chose to overburden herself—preparing breakfast, lunch, and dinner every morning before leaving for work. I didn’t know whom to feel sorry for: Lakshmiyamma, Radha, or Muthukumar.

Some people find it impossible to delegate because they cannot relinquish the reins of control or the sense of importance they believe they hold.

This pattern often surfaces when we coach leaders. Delegation inevitably becomes a topic of discussion, and I have heard every excuse imaginable—even from the most seasoned professionals. From “If I have to explain it, I might as well do it myself” to “I don’t want to expose my team.”

Yet one of the first skills any leader must master is letting go.

Andrew Carnegie, the Scottish-American industrialist and philanthropist, was born into poverty and began his career as a telegrapher. He went on to build the steel industry in the United States and became one of the wealthiest Americans in history. His tombstone captures the essence of his success:

“Here lies a man who knew how to enlist the services of better men than himself.”

Thiruvalluvar’s often-quoted couplet on delegation offers a timeless lesson in leadership:

Idhanai Idhanaal Ivan Mudikkum Endru Aindhu

Adhanai Avan Kann Vidal

“This man, this work shall thus be done—let the leader decide.

Then leave with him the discharge of that duty.”

The beauty of the couplet lies in its final word—Vidal.

Let go.

It is not a suggestion; it is an instruction. After delegating, do not probe, micromanage, doubt, hover, impose your methods, or worry that your importance is fading. If you are delegating well, you have chosen a higher shift in both career and life.

You cannot own and achieve.

You can only lead and succeed.

All these management lessons are encapsulated in that single word—Vidal.

Radha’s second innings ended abruptly. Unable to let go—both at home and at work—she found herself overwhelmed, and her attempt to balance career and household came to a premature close.

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